Ninja Protects His Chicken Nugget

Serious side note: There are much healthier alternatives to the chicken nugget — veggies, for example. Your children may [or may not] be less defensive with veggies.

Princess Gets a 'Bad Day' Letter from Teachers

Serious Side Note: We really did participate in home reiteration.

How to Turn Your Brother Into a Butt Face

1. Tell mom you are going to play with your brother in his room.

2. Place a small chair in front of the inside of brother's door.

3. Climb onto the changing table with your brother.

4. Tell brother that the butt cream is moisturizer.

5. Apply butt cream to brother's face.

Serious Side Note: Boudreaux's Butt Paste has always been the only diaper cream that works for our kids' sensitive skin. We love it. It's a great product, and it has the word "butt" in it — bonus!

How to Get Your Child to Do the Electric Slide

1. Place child at the top of a plastic slide.

2. Push child down the slide.

3. Let static electricity do the rest.

Serious Side Note: If your child is wearing rubber-soled shoes, touch their shoes before you grab them from the bottom of the slide to avoid a possible painful shock.